Piss Revelations (The Birth of FiXT)

Only a few moments ago, I was standing in the studio kitchen eating some chocolate “Quakes” and having casual conversation with Bret Stahli (who had moments prior busted through the door like Kramer in a Seinfeld episode.) Somehow we got on the subject of ‘bright ideas’ (like “quit driving like a dick!” – that’s a bright idea.) I unconsciously blurted out that I often get “Piss Revelations. In fact, FiXT was a Piss Revelation!” (I’ll spell it out for those who may not get it – I come up with ideas when I pee.)

Potty breaks are one of the few moments when I can escape from the phone, the web and Stutter, the attention-whoring cat and just think. Well, Bret instantly shot out of his seat and said “That’s it!!! That’s another title for your blog posts!!” And he was right. I can’t pass it up.

So how does this apply to FiXT? I’m glad you asked. The 3 remaining people who have the courage to read up to this point in the blog will be granted the following golden nugget of truth. (eww, i said ‘nugget’) I started a clothing company years ago and decided to call it “Byte Me Fashions”. It’s like “Bite Me” but it’s “Byte Me” get it?? (“Byte my shiny metal ass??”) Oh, how very clever. Yes clever and boring (and used by 12,436 other companies.) I was never really sold on it. Also, through years of working on music i had developed a naming convention so i know when I’ve actually worked on an audio file. When i time correct a drum loop, synth, bass etc. I would tack “FIXT” on the end of the filename so I knew that I already “FIXTed” it (Could I sound any more like a 3 year old? I sure as hell hope so.) On this particularly nondescript day, I almost got to the point of having to change my Depends Diaper, bc when I’m working I tend to ignore everything, including my bladder. Fortunately, I made it in time and as my bladder was “decompressing” it hit me right in the face – “FIXT.” THAT is what I will call this company.

The end

Look for more exciting “Piss Revelations” as I find time between pee breaks to post them.

[Klayton]

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